Monday, August 22, 2011

Failure to Prepare... preparation to fail.

I'm using this cool, Real Simple graphic of spoons in a drawer again because a) I love it and 2) I've been getting my collective "house" in order. 

 A couple of weekends ago, when I was back home visiting, I was awakened early Sunday morning by screams from my mom.  Needless to say, it was unsettling.  She had fallen in the dark, on her way to the bathroom, and long story short, my brother and I ended up in the ER with her. 

She is totally fine now, although at the time she was beside herself with pain and confusion.  And so were my brother and I.  We did not react very well to this mini-crisis at first, but we picked up the slack and got her the care she needed.

All of this got me to thinking about making arrangements for life's little uncertainties well in advance.  For example, I was faced with this question: Sir, what is your mother allergic to?  And I promptly drew a blank.  My brother knew less than I did.

Now, granted, Barb is completely back to her version of normal now.  And she's way (way) too young to be "falling," but these are the kinds of things one should prepare for before they are needed.  Suze always says that one needs a will and trust.  I'm now working on that, despite my lack of vast wealth or children.

The important thing is to make your wishes known to your immediate family, despite your current health, income, living situation, etc.  If (God forbid) your health were to take a turn for the worse, would you want life support?  Who gets your house?  Your money?  Your creepy doll collection?  Do you want to be buried?  Cremated?  Other?

I'm not trying to be all macabre here, but I've had a bit of a wakeup call, and I want to pass along this life lesson that I'm currently in the midst of learning.


  1. So sorry you went through that scare! So glad you take away a valuable lesson :)

    I survived a life threatening brain injury at 38. It required relearning basic skills, as well as how to relate to the world. It was also a career ending situation. I definitely concur with your new view on things. Thanks for spreadin' the word!

  2. CAN WE BE BEST FRIENDS??? Coming home to a ridiculous number of comments from you in my Inbox was possibly the best surprise I've yet encountered in all of my blogging adventures.

    But really, wrap up whatever nonsense you have going on in Tennessee, move to San Francisco, and then let's hang out for real. I think we would have A LOT to talk about.

    xx, Erin

  3. Also, get a Twitter. I'm @ohhierin and I would love to see what kind of stuff you send out into the Twitterverse in 140 characters.

  4. Oh no - I'm so sorry to hear about your mom's accident! I'm glad she's doing well, though.

    It's scary stuff, but you're totally right that this kind of stuff IS important to think about. Thank you (as weird as it sounds) for the reminder, Tommy!

  5. I have dealt with death a lot in the past year so I have made it known to a lot of my family what I would want but I don't have it in writing. I have also asked my husband what he would want. We really should sit down and write it out.

  6. Hey Tommy, I hope Barb is doing ok. Nothing is quite as scary as when something happens to a parent. She's lucky to have you and Tim looking out for her.

  7. Thanks for the kind words all around, everybody. I usually try not to go the PSA route with my blog, unless it's something I feel very strongly about sharing. :) I hope you're all well.

  8. hi tommy,
    sort of going through something similar... glad to hear your mom is feeling better. and her doll collection *is* presh ;) team barb!

    sarah jane & mittens
    p.s. u owe me an email...and a blog follow.